New Mealtime Complaints

As Patrick woke up from his morning nap yesterday, I found myself groaning to myself that he was already awake again, because that meant it was already time to feed him again. I envisioned those long moments sitting in front of his high chair, feeding him spoonful after spoonful of mushy food and navigating it around his ever-waving arms to avoid spilling, as that means a long clean-up time to follow. I then pictured myself finding ways to entertain both myself and him as he fed himself Cheerio after Cheerio after Cheerio. I never want to go far for fear this is the day he finally chokes on one, but it's difficult for me to hover near when he so clearly doesn't need me anymore, at least not for anything beyond refilling his tray with Cheerios regularly.

I realized as this dread washed over me that mealtimes have again turned into marathon sessions. They remind me of those first few weeks of breastfeeding, when he could easily eat for forty-five minutes at a time and then be ready to eat two hours after finishing the last meal. Obviously, mealtimes are infinitely more entertaining now, and I'm not about to complain about not needing to get up during the night anymore. Still, I think I'll be more than content when he can feed himself at a more consistent pace and when we can schedule his meals so that he eats with us, not before or after us while attempting to entertain himself while we eat. (We have tried the joint mealtimes, and they work, but they can be frustrating trying to coordinate feeding both myself and Patrick at the same time.)

Patrick's careful observation of Daddy and me while we eat has begun to pay off. He now imitates us. Sometimes if we're eating and he's not, he will chew along with us, even though he clearly has nothing to chew. I love it when he's eating his own food. He'll get a bite of nearly-liquid pears that clearly doesn't need to be chewed, and he'll continue opening and closing his mouth long after swallowing the bite, like he's chewing it carefully. I'm quite sure he chews all his food now because he sees Daddy and Mommy chewing and thinks that is just what you do when you eat, even when the food is runny enough to not need chewing. I think it's also a sign that he's ready for more solid food, more like what Mommy and Daddy eat.

And now the sappy moment of the day: Patrick's fussiness is starting to finally go away (thank goodness!), and it is being replaced with clinginess. It's not an I-don't-feel-good clinginess either, but an I-love-you-Mommy (or Daddy) clinginess. Yesterday he actually let me rock him quietly for a few minutes! Today as I put him down for his morning nap, he gave me the sweetest hug. It may have been his plea not to go back to sleep, but I think he was just telling me he loves me in the only way he knows how. I have no idea how long I stood there by his crib with his arms tightly around my neck and one hand buried in my hair--not to pull it, but just to hold me close. I was reluctant to finally put him in his crib, but he seemed happy to be there too, as though he had gotten what he wanted from that hug and was now ready for bed.